Homesick.

It's crazy to see just how quickly everything can change. One minute I was sitting at school wishing I wasn't there, and two weeks later I would never return. You always want what you can't have. When you tell a child they cannot sit in the front seat, they immediately want to sit there. When you're told to stay inside, you want nothing more than to be outside. The longer I sit in quarantine, the more and more I began to feel homesick. Which obviously sounds crazy. Being inside all day, with your family, in your house, seems to be the exact opposite of homesickness.

However, as a military brat, this is something that I have personally struggled with, and my friends who move constantly as well end up dealing with. You just want to go home. Even though you are "home". But what is home? I used to say home is where your stuff is or home is where your family is, but after years of moving, even the places that I used to reside, no longer feel like home. The buildings changed, the people changed, it even feels different being around my own family after five years apart. I go back to the place I consider to be my "home" and it's so different each and every time, that I feel like a stranger. I walk through the streets of my neighborhood and even after two years in California, I often feel like a sojourner.

Often times life feels like a freight train burrowing through a train station in which several more people were hoping to climb aboard, yet the train moved too fast for anyone to climb aboard. It's almost as if your life is moving without you. It feels like yesterday I was unpacking my room, buying things in order to feel at "home". But now it's the next day. The reset button was seemingly pushed overnight, and now the boxes have slowly crept back into my house once again. Ready to be reloaded repacked and reshipped across the U.S. once more.

Yet the question still lingers, what is home? Over the past five years, I've learned that home definitely can't be defined as where belongings reside, although that could be true to a certain extent. A home can't be defined as "stuff" in fact, through the past few months I've been working on becoming a minimalist because I realized that life is not about what you have or what you don't have, it's about using what you do have to accomplish and achieve whatever you have set your mind to execute. At the end of the day, your personal "home" can be whatever you make it to be. I found that when I'm with my family is when I feel the most at home. Despite not actually seeing most of my siblings face-to-face for years at a time, they are still my family and still where I feel at home.

My question to you is, what do you consider to be your home? Have you ever experienced homesickness after moving? I would love to hear your story! Follow the contact link under this post and tell me what you think.

I'll write again soon,

Nia